Good Ol' Betty Friedan

I'm in deep and serious thought today. I've been web surfing, and it has brought me to the subject of Betty Friedan, the famous "feminist", and her influence on the world we now live in.

I realize that many women are happy to be in what our parents called " A Man's World", working full time and coming home to their families at night. Some are doctors and lawyers, business women, actresses, journalists, teachers, social workers and cops. I'm glad they're there, and appreciate the services they provide for us.

Being a homemaker: I thought it was
the Cherry on the Cake of Life

Of course, many of them get personal reward from working outside the home, and can pay others to do at home child care and housekeeping. But most women don't get paid enough to provide such luxuries. Yet, they still must pay for childcare, and they have to clean, cook and get up in the middle of the night with sick kids after a hard day working at a "real job". They don't all like their jobs. They may not even "choose to work". Yet they have to, because that is the lot they have inherited from Friedan and Friends.

Few families can afford for the woman to stay home, caring for her family and household. I think it is most unfortunate; even sad.

Below is a comment I wrote today in response to a post on WorldNetDaily about Betty Friedan. I'd like to share it with you.

As a woman who was witness to Friedan's writings and ravings while in my early adult years, I agree that Betty has done much to destroy the American family and womanhood. Having always looked forward to being a homemaker and mother as my career, I felt threatened by Friedan and her ilk. I didn't understand how "feminists" could call themselves by that name while striving to be like men. That was freedom? It seemed illogical that a woman would want to give up the true freedom of the homemaker and the privelege of raising her own children for just another 9-to-5 job.
Unfortunately, Betty's campaign was quite successful. Now, few women who wish to stay home and raise their own children either can afford to or are encouraged and supported to do so by their husbands. After working in my home for over 30 years and having only worked outside the home for 7 3/4 years previous to my marriage, I can no longer share ownership in my own home and can't receive social security. Funny, if it wasn't so sad. I could have paid someone to raise my kids and clean my house and cook my dinners, and decorate my home and see my children's first steps, but since I didn't demand a paycheck from my good husband for the hard work I did, I am not considered having ever worked. Thanks for nothing, Betty.

As you can see, I have always thought it odd that people nowadays don't consider stay-at-home moms to be workers. Homemakers do what those folks pay strangers to do for them, but we do so without a paycheck. So it isn't working...? We clean house, cook meals, and wipe little noses all day long. We take the dog to the vet, pick up the kids from school, referee sibling rivalry and sometimes do the gardening, architectural designs and decorating of our houses. (Which, again, we lowly housewives can only own our own homes if our husbands die first and leave them to us in a will.) People who are hired to do any or all of those things get paid. They "work".

But not us. We're merely housewives.

It hasn't always been easy. I haven't always done a good job. Sometimes being a homemaker has been lonely; even miserable. But it was right for me, and I am grateful for having been given the opportunity by a generous husband who worked hard to provide this lifestyle for me and for our children. Being able to be a stay-at-home mom has been a privelege and a blessing, indeed.

As for good ol' Betty Friedan: Once again, thanks for nothing.

But to my supportive husband, I say, "Thanks, honey. I owe you big time."

You might find the column by Ellis Washington on WorldNetDaily interesting, too. I think this will get you there: http://www.wnd.com/?pageId=366917&fb_comment_id=fbc_10150373686222992_21343705_10150467477637992#f1a6d3d9a7a9489

Blessing: A Gift of Love

I love this film. It's actually very cute, so I decided to share it with you.

Hallelujah! It is time to celebrate life, love and family by gathering together with great food, lots of laughter, and a few well thought out gifts. 

Last year I wrote a post on gift ideas that you can make for someone you love. But this year I have an idea that you can give to everyone you love. It can be very simple or as complicated as you want it to be. But no matter how you decide to do it, it will bless that person. And you know what? It can be a great last-minute gift, too! It is so simple, yet so perfect, that I think some fanfare is in order:

Tooot ta-ta-toot!

Presenting...the...Blessing!

A blessing can be long or short. It can be big or small. It can be something they can hang over their bed, wear around their neck , tuck into their Bible, or keep in their pocket or purse.

I am going to make a blessing for every person in my family. So if you know how large my family is and how last minute this is, you know I'm going to have to prepare some very speedy blessings. Here are some of the ways I may choose to bless my sweeties:

Jewelry: I make jewelry, and I have metal stamps that I can use to put a favorite blessing on. But if you don't make jewelry, you still may have time to go to a store that does engraving, and have a necklace, charm, glass or other object engraved with a blessing. You may want to just have verse (like the scripture Jeremiah 29:11) engraved on the object.

Paper:  Of course the quickest and least expensive thing you can do is write a blessing out on paper. You can make something to hang on the wall; you can frame it or make a poster. A bookmark is a good choice. Using a sturdy piece of card stock, write or collage the verse onto the paper, embellish it with ribbon, buttons, and pretty papers, and Voila.

Book:  Tiny books are easier to make than you might think. You just figure out how large you want the book to be and how many pages you'll need. Then cut the paper twice that size, so it can be folded in half. Next, with a heavy needle and some sturdy thread, make a row of stitches down the seam. Then, with a pen or pencil, write the blessing out in your own hand. Decorate any blank pages, or leave them blank so your friend can write thoughts or answered prayers on them.

Below is a demonstration on how to make an Origami book:

Clay: I know I was talking about quick and easy, but if you work in clay, you can make a tile and write or stamp letters in it, and put a slit on the back for it to be hung on a wall.

Sew: A pillow would be a great thing to write a blessing on. Just write it on using fabric paints.

Embroidery: I embroidered the Aaronic Blessing on a piece of cloth and framed it for my husband long ago. You don't need a fancy pattern. Just write it on the cloth and stitch over it with embroidery floss.

Wood: Any piece of board or wood can make a sign or a plaque. First, just paint your board with a base color.  You may be able to find an old painted piece of wood that already has a character of its own. If so, then leave it as is. Then write out the words lightly in pencil. Paint them on. Then add a couple of screw eyes or nails to the top edte of the board, add wire or a sturdy twine, and it's ready for hanging.

Now for a few of those Bible blessings:

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. Plans to prosper and not to harm you. Plans for a future and a hope.

Aaronic Blessing: Numbers 6: 22-27
May the Lord bless you and keep you;
May He make His face to shine on you
and be gracious to you;
May he lift up his countenance upon you
and give you his peace..

Jude 24-25
Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy, to the only wise God our Saviour, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and for ever, Amen.

Romans 16: 24
May the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ be with you. Amen

Psalm 91:
This whole Psalm is actually a blessing, but some of my favorite verses are below.
Because you have made the Lord your resting place,
No evil shall befall you, neither shall any plague come near your dwelling. For he shall give his angels charge over you, to keep you in all your ways. They shall bear you up in their hands, lest you dash your foot against a stone.
Because he has set his love upon me (says the Lord), therefore I will deliver him: I will set him on high, because he has known my name. He shall call upon me and I will answer him: I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him and honour him. With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation.

And for children, here is one I'm sure you've heard before:
I see the moon and the moon sees me.
The moon sees somebody I want to see.
God bless the moon and God bless me,
And God bless the somebody I want to see.

For a few more special blessings, check this out: http://www.wilsonmar.com/benedic.htm

Of course, you may make up your own. I always blessed my children as I tucked them into bed. I made a cross on their foreheads and said, "God bless you in the name of Jesus." Then I sealed it with a kiss. Then I let them bless me back. It was a sweet way to end the day.

I must go; I've got lots of blessings to make, and I better get started right away. I would like to write more on blessings next week. If not, then next year!

In the meantime, I think I'd like to leave you with this blessing:

May God make his angels to watch over you and your loved ones. May he bless the work of your hands and the words of your mouth. May he show favor to you and your loved ones, and give you peace, strength and joy. Amen.

Happy, Happy holidays, my friend.

Father and Mother Know Best

When I was 11, my mother sat me down for the talk. It was time to prepare her young daughter for the woman budding inside that awkward, undeveloped child body. She told me how I was growing up, and she explained about periods, what I should expect, and that they were one of the things that made me different from men. Some day, she said, thanks to that change in my body, I would be able to become a mother, myself. When I finally started my period, I was very excited. I ran to tell my mom, and she hugged me tight. It was sweet, as it should be.

Mama was good! I mean, how many people could take something many women refer to as “the curse” and make it into a blessing? It sounded romantic. It was part of life, and life was beautiful. I never saw it as anything less.

My mother was a beauty, wasn't she? And wise.

Nowadays, the job of educating our children about sexuality is being taken from parents and given to others. I am concerned. Sexuality is an intimate and beautiful thing. But for years, people have been making it into something else. No longer special, sex has become a casual act, often vulgar and crude.

It seems that more important than physical health, honesty and normalcy these days is Political Correctness: Not Offending Anyone, Ever. (Well, that doesn’t include everyone, like people with traditional lifestyles or values.) Homosexuality is at the top of the list of the Politically Protected. Homosexuality, along with other non-traditional ideas, is being introduced to children as young as kindergarten, through books and other materials.

And according to a recent report, this new sexual education format is confusing to many young children. Some kids are concluding that since their best friends are the same sex as them, it must mean that they are all gay.

Regardless of how you view homosexuality, you will surely agree that if your child is not homosexual at age 4 or 6, you will not want him or her to adopt homosexuality simply because of confusion from a poorly taught class on family and sexuality. I see several problems with this agenda:

1.       These concepts are being taught to increasingly younger children, who may not be mature enough or emotionally ready to understand diverse sexual concepts, such as homosexuality or promiscuity.

2.       They teach sex education  in the classroom setting, with both sexes of children. (This is to help children to “not be embarrassed” in front of the opposite sex, but my kids tell me that this just discouraged them from asking questions at all.)

3.       Classrooms are not like home. There are no private times when it would be appropriate to answer individual questions of a personal nature. Even if a private moment for questions were available, teachers are not always “safe”. They aren’t the  people responsible for the child’s welfare. That job belongs to the parents.

4.       Nope, teachers are not the family. They do not know their students as well as most parents know their children. They do not love the children as the parents do. (Unfortunately, not all parents are good parents, but schools and teachers aren’t able to replace inadequacies in the home.)

I’m not saying every school does a bad job or every parent does a good job. But it is and should be the parent’s job to teach his or her children about sexuality.

Now a couple of questions to parents who are relieved to have the schools take over this difficult task: Would you leave sexual education of your child up to the stranger down the street? Then why would you leave it up to a school teacher that you hardly know? Do you want your children to have your personal values about sex and family? Why do you think the schools know more about what’s good for your children than you do?

A few quick tips on talking to your children:

1.      Get a right attitude. Who is better able to talk to your own kid about sex? Admit it. You know something about sex...probably quite a bit. You want your child to understand from your personal point of view. You can talk to your kid about it.

2.      Let your children know that they can talk to you about anything. No matter what your kid's age, you need to let them know that if they ever have a question, any question, they can come to you. You will not judge them. You won't laugh at them (in a ridiculing way). You will not be afraid of any question, because life is complicated and full of crazy questions. Sometimes those questions may make you blush. That's okay. Blushing is permitted.

3.      Consider the individual personalities of each child. Some kids are open and communicative, like one of my sons who had a gift for intimate questions. Others are private and struggle with communication. Accept that, and realize that they may choose not to share their secrets with you. That's okay. But let them know that your door is always open.

4.      Earn their trust. If you are a critical, judgmental parent, your child will not feel safe talking to you about things that you may disapprove of. Correct, but don't criticize. (I'm not saying its easy!) Never call them lazy or bad. Teach them that mistakes are learning experiences. They are part of being human. Life still exists after mistakes.

5.      Be unashamed. Kings and Queens have sex. Movie stars get constipated. Doctors go to the doctor. Preachers have bad thoughts that they have to reign in. Kids are curious. If we don't know the answer, we know how to look it up.

6.      Believe in yourself. You are the parent. You are the one who is emotionally, financially and legally responsible for your child's care for 18 to 26 years of age, depending to the schooling arangement. You have the right to teach them your values. As a matter of fact, you not only have the right, but it’s your responsibility. Your honor.

7.      Start today. Sit down with your children as soon as possible, and tell them you love them enough to be able to answer their questions, whatever they are. You will love them forever, no matter what. They are good, even if they have thoughts that aren’t good. Then brace yourself...it's coming!

8.      Pray with them. Pray for them. Bless them.

Pirate Dance

My grandson and I were baking Scottish Shortbread Cookies (find the recipe here: http://recklesslydancingwhilesupperburns.blogspot.com/2011/06/scottish-shortbread-cookies-with.html).

He kept tasting the dough, because it is absolutely yummy. He'd say, "Mmm. This cookie dough is so delicious," as soon as I had whipped the sugar into the butter. But once the flour was mixed in, he couldn't keep his little hands out of the stuff. Being just three ingredients (and no eggs), he was able to safely eat all the dough his little fingers could sneak.

Finally, he said, "Nonnie, this cookie dough is so good, it makes me want to do the Pirate Dance." And with that, he leaped off the little step stool and began to dance. He took this very seriously, by the way. I had to make him freeze for a minute while I ran and got my camera, and then I was able to film this to share with the rest of the family and our friends. I'm glad I did, because he has refused to do the Pirate Dance ever since...although he did teach Sydney to do it just the other day. Now that was hilarious! Boy, where was my camera for that one?

The Pirate Dance:

Fourteen: A 21 Tweet Story

Famous people I've seen: I saw Hoss Cartwright at Six Gun Territory when I was a kid.
In high school, I partied with the red-headed kid from the Flipper television show. Again, at Six Gun Territory.

Ross Allen, the famous reptile guy, used to come to my school every year to do a personal show for our class.

Newt Perry, Johnny Weissmuller's trainer and a famous Tarzan director, was my science teacher and my friend's dad.

I saw Alec Baldwin and his x at a restaurant in Wilmington a few days before I learned they'd just gotten married.

He was cute then. That was before we all knew what a creep he is.

I was at the airport once when I heard a call "Your limo is ready" for the guy that sang "Don't Worry, Be Happy". Didn't see him. Dang.

I know it was Stevie Wonder I saw on the plane that day a couple of years ago. I love Stevie. Unfortunately, he didn't see me.


Okay. Now you know everyone famous I've ever met or seen or been in the airport with.

Wait. There's one more, who was Incognito at the time, in an ugly purple jogging suit. I think...who is that guy...dark hair...

He came into a coffee shop where my daughter was. We sat down and talked for a while. She was enamored. He was, too.

She looked much older than her 14 years. He was asking her a bunch of questions when her age came up.

I knew she'd have liked to say, "I'm 16", which still would have been way too young for him, but she said, "I'm 14."

He did a major double-take. He said, "F-f...did you say fourteen? You're f-f-fourteen?"

"Yes," she answered softly.

So the subject suddenly changed, and we started talking about other things. Safer things.

After a few minutes he forgot about the previous conversation, and started to ask me another question about my daughter...

He was like, "so...your daughter..." Then the light bulb came back on in his head. "Oh, yeah...are you...she's fourteen?"

Later he came by my gallery and met all my girls. After he left, they agreed it had to be that actor, whose name's on the tip of my tongue.

The youngest one said, "I saw him first. He's mine."

After that, she would sometimes just say his name, like it was honey on her tongue.

Then she would say, "I should have told him I was fifteen. Fourteen is just so young!"

Making your own Bonsai....in pictures...it's not so hard if you don't expect perfection...

I'll try anything once...if its not illegal, immoral or stupid.

One of the things that I keep trying and trying is the fascinating art of Bonsai. I have books on Bonsai; several of them. I am obsessed with the process of turning an ordinary potted plant (in this case, a Buxus Sempervirens - Dwarf English Boxwood) into a tree in miniature. Instead of writing a lot of words on the subject tonight, I'm going to illustrate it for you in photographs. I know you can get this stuff on other websites, by Bonsai pro's, and I'm not a pro. But it is sometimes encouraging to learn something from a friend, and not a professional. Professional perfectionism can be intimidating. You won't be intimidated by my Bonsai skills.




This is what I was shooting for when I bought an English Boxwood yesterday.
This comes from the book "The Living Art of Bonsai'
by Professor Amy Liang
An excellent book with lots of examples and information
about growing and maintaining Bonsai.

I told my husband today that I had a hankerin' for makin' a Bonsai,

 a miniature tree. Again.

I get on a Bonsai Binge about once every year or two.

Though I have made them before, but the real trick is as much in

maintaining them through a hot summer as it is making them.

So although I've done this again and again, I must keep trying.

We went to Home Depot and found this potted, untamed beauty for $4.45.

A bargain indeed! With a thick trunk, it should make a great Bonsai.

(And if you want to make it into a Bonsai,

 and you aren't a professional, it better be a bargain.)

I chose this English Boxwood for three reasons.
1. English Boxwoods make great Bonsai trees.
2. It was cheap, probably because it had been in the ground for a while before they sent it to Home Depot.
3. It had this great trunk, thick leaf growth, and exposed, developed roots.

After you've decided what you are shooting for,

(I wanted a tree with an interesting trunk...something...interesting.)

I hold down the branches and decide "does this look good? Does this look stupid")
If it doesn't break while I'm holding it down,
then I save it for wiring.

The first cut is the hardest. Do a little planning before you begin:
Look beneath the leaves, and figure out what you have under all that foliage.
 Then you can decide what to keep and what to discard. Be gentle as you do these things.
This boxwood was brittle, and in the process of making it into a Bonsai,
I did loose a couple of desirable limbs. But, hey. It's just for fun. Right?

It was really difficult to decide how low to trim the boxwood.
I decided to go easy on her, and trimmed less than I think may look best.
Take it slow. You can always cut off more, but you can't put it back.



Wiring a Bonsai is an art in itself. You may want to look up how to
wire a Bonsai before you start.
I'm not very good at it, but I stumble through it.
 I used copper wire in different sizes.
You wrap the branches around and around,
so you can arrange them to grow in an attractive way,
 and keep them in that position until the wood hardens up and stays that way.

When I was done with my creation, I cut the pot off the root ball.
I didn't want to damage the work I'd done.

This is a picture of my Bonsai, first night. I have potted it in a temporary pot, and I will keep it here until it has survived the winter. In March, I will take it out of here, and move it into a medium sized Bonsai pot (a little wider than the branching width.) I will trim only the roots necessary to keep the plant alive. *see note below.
I have to admit, even I have done better,
but working with such a mature plant was much
more difficult for me than working with smaller, fresher plants.

You know, my Bonsai is at the "awkward teenager" stage. Actually, it turned out to look a lot like some of my artwork, like "Old Queen Elizabeth", above. I am not finished with this bonsai, yet. I have potted it in a larger pot than I want, and I'm going to give it a rest and save trimming the roots for another time, after I've had time to think about the type of pot I want to use. For now, I'm ready to tackle the Azalea I just bought. This one should be interesting, too.

You might want to try your own hand at making a bonsai. You can do it. My advice is start with an inexpensive plant, go easy on it, and just have fun. Don't expect perfection...nature isn't perfect, either.

Update - One Year Later:

I thought you'd want to see the above Bonsai after one year. I have done more trimming as I saw fit, and have kept new growth to a minimum. It is slowly becoming more of the vision I had in mind when it was begun.

Just as I said I should, I did leave this tree for planting into a Bonsai pot until March. At that time, I removed it from the blue pot. I trimmed the roots as much as I could, *leaving enough large roots to anchor the plant and enough of the small, fine roots which are for water gathering. I like the look of a tree growing on a little hill, which also accommodated all the roots, so I allowed it to mound above the pot, as much for effect as for the health of the tree.
 

The front of this Bonsai is pictured at left, and the back is pictured at right. I chose the one on the left to be called the front because I like the roots showing. Unfortunately, I have once again lost a couple of branches when potting this year, due to brittleness. I am hoping some new branches will start next spring. If so, I will find one worth keeping, and train it to grow to replace the lost branch. Around the base, I added local moss which I found around my apartment, and some micro-thyme, as a ground cover. It's healthy and doing well. We keep it well watered, and fertilize occasionally with fish emulsion, at half strength.

Bonsai is not an art for the impatient soul...unless you buy one ready made by someone else who has the patience of Job. But Bonsai is well worth waiting for. I just like being able to say, I did this one, myself.

...So what if everyone else is thinking..."Yes...I believe you..." :)

 

 

 



Videoville - Just for Fun

You know, if you dress up a little ratty, people want to pet them. It's that simple. Just ask this lady who makes beautiful costumes for pretty little rats.

Easy Scottish Shortbread Cookies With Healthy Variations

Very easy to make: Scottish Shortbread Cookies

The other day, I wanted to bake cookies, but realized that at the apartment, I didn't have many ingredients I usually use when baking cookies. No baking soda or baking powder, and just a bit of sugar. I looked in an old cookbook, and to my surprise, did find one recipe with only three ingredients: flour, butter and white sugar. They were so easy, and were gone in a jiffy.

Because the ingredients are so natural and simple, this is a great recipe to make with small children.

Here's the basic recipe:

Scottish Shortbread Cookies

1 cup butter, room temperature - beat until fluffy
1 cup sugar - add to butter
2 1/2 cups flour - gradually add to butter/sugar mixture, 1/2 cup at a time, until just blended, and it forms into a single ball (much like a pie crust texture)

When it gets to this consistancy, you don't need to mix anymore.
It will make a ball, pulling away from the sides of the bowl.

Place on a floured board. Roll out into a 1/8" to 1/4" sheet. Place the whole thing on a cookie sheet. Pierce with a fork, and cut into squares.

Bake at 300 degrees until brown (depending on how thick you rolled it, it may cook from 20 to 30 minutes.

Take from the oven and separate while still warm.

Easy as pie...

Rolled out and ready for the oven

Here are some variations which you may add individually or in combinations:

For higher protein and lower carbs, replace 1 cup of flour with almond meal (which I found at Trader Joe's).

Replace some or all of the white sugar with brown sugar.

You can cut with cookie cutters, or roll out in a circle and cut into wedges like a pizza.

Crushed lavender flowers (no more than a half a teaspoon, unless you really like the floral taste of lavender). Mmmm...

Crushed rosemary (very finely crushed, and only 1/4 teaspoon).

Vanilla extract (I use homemade: to make it, slice several vanilla beans lengthwise, chop into 1/2" pieces, and drop into a bottle of bourbon, coniac or brandy, and allow to sit for at least six weeks before use. Then shake well.)

Or you can just scrape the seeds out of a vanilla bean and use them instead of extract.

Lemon or orange zest (finely grated peel)

1/3 cup currants

Crushed walnuts or pecans

1 Tablespoon Cinnamon

A dash of fresh ground Nutmeg

Sprinkle with sugar or sprinkles before baking



Recommendation: If you do a lot of baking, you might want to consider purchasing a sturdy mixer, like the Kitchen Aid stand mixer. They come in a variety of sizes, are heavy duty, and last a lifetime. They also come in lots of pretty colors. You can buy attachments for them, like a pasta maker or meat grinder. I bought a new 5 quart one at Dillards last week, and am getting a free glass bowl with the purchase.

http://www.shopkitchenaid.com/countertop-appliances-1/stand-mixers-3/102020011/?WT.srch=1

Enjoy!

Friday Flash: Butter Frosting

Butter Frosting

It’s four-O-three in the morning and I am awake. Tick tock. Tick tock. Tick tock…

Now it’s four-O-five and a half. I am alone in my wakened state in a large, empty house. It has been an hour since the last time I looked at the clock. Or so it seems.

I notice I am starving.

The Cake

It’s that damned homemade cake with butter frosting.

That confection has been on my mind ever since it came out of the oven, unfrosted. Now that it is decorated in butter and powdered sugar, it's calling me by name.
I shall ignore, I say to myself.

But it cries out even as the clock has halted its ticking. “It’s lonely down here in the kitchen under this stupid glass,” I hear a grumpy little voice rising from downstairs. “I’m afraid of thunder, don’t you know? Nobody loves me.” Is it whining, now?

The Storm

It started raining at precisely at midnight, tonight. I could hear dripping on the sill outside my window as I turned out the light. I was waiting to drift off into an artificially induced sleep as the sound of angry thunder came rumbling down the hill beyond the garden gate. It sloshed through the meadow and stumbled o’er the trees to rest upon the metal rooftop above my bed, where it pattered like a dozen barefoot schoolboys.

Strange thoughts had settled into my head as I lay there in the dark.

Luckily, that’s when slumber came. It swooshed up unexpectedly from out of my brain on the left hand side, slightly above the ear. Here. It slithered down across my shoulders and curled itself back up my neck, at last climbing into my eyes, holding them closed from the inside out, even momentarily against my will.

The dripping got louder for a moment, and then…nothing…

But the artificial sleep inducing pill doesn’t last long when the recipient only takes a quarter and not even a half a pill because of concerns with the possible side effects posted in a patchwork quilt of warnings on the bottle. This time it’s magic had lasted until just after three fifteen a.m., when I finally got up to go to the bathroom.

It was barely raining now, but the leftover drippings from the leaking gutters were much louder than they had been at midnight. They crashed into the tiny river that had now formed on the ground below, sounding more like clanging wind chimes than watery little plops.

The Labels

I got up again and flipped on the naked bathroom light, reaching into the cabinet for an hour's worth more sleep, when a label on the side of the label right beside the prescription label suddenly caught my eye. “Do not take the other half of that half at this time of night, or you'll be hopelessly out of your mind tomorrow. Get up, instead. Do not watch television or read anything disquieting. Don't eat. Do something relaxing until you are drowsy again. What? How would we know what relaxes you; surely something…”

That isn’t word for word what the label on the label said, but that was the jest of it. Yes, jest as in “You’ve got to be kidding”. For why would a bottle of sleep tell you to find something to do instead of taking one of its members?

The Cake Again

Back to the cake that troubles me still, with its winsome face and never ending chatter.

Why did I bake it when I could have bought a single one; a little cupcake from a fancy shop, enveloped in pretty paper, wrapped up in a bakery box with cellophane on top. That would have been so wise.

So chic.

So “2011”.

The Thief

I find myself rising from bed once again. I am painfully weary of listening to that naughty cake’s complaints. I descend the stair and enter the kitchen. Strange. The glass cover sits beside the cake, and the knife is out on the counter. A large slice has been removed. Whoever did it didn’t know how to slice a cake properly. They chopped off a hunk from the side…getting more than their share of frosting, I might add.

Breathing heavily, I consider this. My cake has been disfigured. I feel quite uneasy, for as I told you, I am alone in this house tonight. I hurriedly pull the curtains closed, and check the window locks and the kitchen door. All are secure, as usual. This makes no sense. Unless...

So, I think to myself:

This means someone must have entered through the door, perhaps with a key, and cut a piece of cake, (wrongly sliced and overly large) and left with it in their bare hand. As I brush a bit of hair out of my eyes, my fingers get caught on a sticky knot in my tresses. Then I notice a hint of buttery frosting under my fingernails. There are even cake crumbles upon my cheek.

Strange…and even more interesting…

…the intruder must have climbed the stair, hands full of cake, and sat upon my bed to eat his overly large and improperly sliced piece of cake as his watched me sleeping soundly during the storm. (It had to be a man, for no woman would ever take such a large piece or cut it from the side, even if they love butter frosting more than anything.) I hope I was sleeping with my mouth closed while he sat and ate…I’m glad I was wearing my lacy floral gown…I have a secret admirer…who loves cake every bit as much as I do!

Me and the Cake

I take down my finest dessert plate, pull out my favorite silver plated fork, and proceed to cut a chunk of cake from off the other side. “You know,” the cake says to me, “you should get a bigger slice of me than the one the ‘thief’ took. After all, it’s your house, and I am your beloved cake.” I sit down in the living room, and hear the little voice once more; this time coming from the plate in my sticky little hands. “You do love me,” the cake coos. “Don’t gobble, my love. But savor every delicious bite."
Goodnight.

Cadbury Eyebrows

Cadbury Eyebrows (official version)

I just wanted to share this with you. The best part is when she breaks out the pink balloon. My daughter Joie put this on her facebook page. The little girl reminds me of her.

I have never wanted to have fancy eyebrows before this. My tongue is sort of fancy, though.